ANONYMENTS!

[yiskah]

On the request of ONE OF YOU WHO SHALL REMAIN NAMELESS, I am deeming today Anon Comment Friday. (If I can work out how to enable anonymous comments on the new LJ update page, GOD.) Tell me things that make you happy! Tell me things that make you sad! Share your hopes, your dreams, your scandal! Write a song! Write a poem! Draw a picture in Paint and post it! Etc.

I am off RAFTING ON THE GODDAMN NILE around 4pm and need to work like a bastard until then, so I probably won't be checking in much - play nice, lovelies.

x

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Testing...

[(Anonymous)]

[yiskah.livejournal.com]

Seriously? Not even the one person who DEMANDED anonyments has commented? DEATH OF LJ INDEED.

[(Anonymous)]

The person who demanded comments is probably on vacation and therefore not up on the whole Friday-at-a-computer thing. Hehe.

[(Anonymous)]

Last night I did that thing for the first time where you meet someone (in a friend context not a dating context) and text your friend afterwards going 'OMG what a nob this person is, seriously', while simultaneously being like 'So nice to meet you! Let's do it again!' at the person in question. It felt pretty insincere and tacky, but I did have to share some of the gems from the conversation. 'Steve Jobs' death really affected me' was one, followed by 'I dropped out of my PhD because I felt that after a couple of years I'd pushed back the frontiers of research enough, and that's the main thing'.

[(Anonymous)]

'I dropped out of my PhD because I felt that after a couple of years I'd pushed back the frontiers of research enough, and that's the main thing'.

THAT IS GLORIOUS.

[yiskah.livejournal.com]

I am totally going to start using that as my excuse for dropping out of TWO PhDs.

[(Anonymous)]

But did you seeeeeeeend the text ... to the person the text was about?

[(Anonymous)]

This was going to be my question too! Hello Dan

[(Anonymous)]

I am so not Dan.

[(Anonymous)]

Oh god, I'm so sorry!

[(Anonymous)]

Haha, no worries!

[(Anonymous)]

Oh hahahaha! HAHAHA oh wow.

[(Anonymous)]

I HAVE A NEW JOOOOOB! Contract is in the post, so it looks like they didn't make a mistake omg!

[yiskah.livejournal.com]

WHO COULD THIS POSSIBLY BE.

Hurrah, I am very pleased for you!

[(Anonymous)]

JESS. WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE, JESS. WHAT. WHAT. When work give any indication that they might want me to stay, I want to run away to the hills, the hills, and learn Spanish/volunteer with exciting organisations/make massive burning sculptures. When work give any sign that they might not want me to say, I want to cling to their legs and wail 'WHY WON'T YOU LOVE ME' and then chain myself to the building. WHAT.

yours in the spirit of international women's day and wanting to have it all, a not-very-anon.

[yiskah.livejournal.com]

I KNOW EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL WHAT IS WRONG WITH US ETC ETC.

[(Anonymous)]

Once in Skyrim I killed my housecarl just so I could search her and see what she looked like with her armour off.

Skyrim: just because you can, doesn't mean you should.

[yiskah.livejournal.com]

...gosh. What DID she look like?

[(Anonymous)]

I like my super boyfriend ever so much, but now I am settling down, I will never have any adventures like you do again! Then again, I wasn't really having any adventures like you do in the first place. Geez, what a loser.

[yiskah.livejournal.com]

I don't think settling down precludes adventures, does it? OR DOES IT? This is probably where I've been going wrong.

[(Anonymous)]

I don't think you've been going wrong anywhere! But mind you don't pick a stay-at-home like me! (Still, being a stay-at-home meant that he identified a potential FLOOD in our flat and got it fixed, so it is a pretty useful personality trait really...)

[(Anonymous)]

I just quit my job! And I have nothing else to go to. But that is the plan - I can take a few months off and just chill, and figure out what's next. It is simultaneously exciting and completely terrifying, as I haven't not worked from the age of 16. But I'm so exhausted and burned out, it needed to happen.

ARG

[yiskah.livejournal.com]

That sounds great! I have quit my job without a new job to go to multiple times in my life (and am indeed doing it now!) and only once did it all fall dramatically apart, which was when said quitting coincided with the global economic meltdown of 2008. So I am sure you will be fine! Enjoy your time off.

[(Anonymous)]

I wish I had the balls to do this. I want to, I think it would be a good idea since I feel very stuck where I am, but then I have THE FEAR that I will never be employed again and run out of money. I do enjoy my daydream of handing in my notice though.

[(Anonymous)]

So - men who shave their pubic hair.
My man has a little bit of hair just above his erm, tool, shall we call it.
I'm happy if he's happy, but I could take it or leave it.

But what about other ladies - is it weird, sexy or something in between?

[tassie-gal.livejournal.com]

Depends if he is shaved all over or just there...

[yiskah.livejournal.com]

I'm not a fan of shaven men, I must say. I like a bit of hair (though not ENORMOUS amounts) - BUT I would never encourage or discourage any dude re. shaving, because I'd hate it if they did it to me.

[(Anonymous)]

I should say that it's just around his genitals - he has hair elsewhere - chest, legs etc. He just shaves around his genitals with a little bit left above his d*ck.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm worried I'm profoundly infancy able but I don't know why. I'd be a great person to go out with! But nobody ever seems to find me attractive, and it makes me sad.

[(Anonymous)]

Unfanciable! Oh autocorrect. I might be infancy able too but I hope not.

[(Anonymous)]

Aww no! Other people are wrong.

[(Anonymous)]

Maybe it's this bag I have over my head.

[yiskah.livejournal.com]

Oh anon, I feel exactly the same way about 98% of the time! I wish I could offer advice but I can only offer sympathy. I bet you are totally fanciable, though!

[(Anonymous)]

This isn't especially scandalous, but I'm trying to hatch a plot to go to Iraqi Kurdistan for work. I'm not military, just fascinated by the region. I'm afraid that one of my more experienced colleagues will get the chance to go instead of me just because he speaks Arabic. He may have the language, but I have far more passion for this part of the world than he does. That has to count for something!!!

[yiskah.livejournal.com]

Oooh, I am jalouse! It is one of the places fairly high up on my list of where I would like to go next. (Who are you, anon??)

[(Anonymous)]

Sooooo I didn't post earlier because I was busy doing the thing that is worth posting anonymously about! Getting busy, that is.

I'm definitely having a super hot sexy affair with a Very Hot Girl oh my god. Holy Shit. So am I hotter now that I'm older, which is why I can somehow magically attract beautiful women, or is it just that as a straighty, there weren't endless queues of hot men because, well, I was a lesbo? Curious. Anyway, said hot girl is also very smart and nice, she said quickly, as it is International Women's Day, and let's not be objectifying our own.

What else? Not much. I'm exhausted. Exhausted, I tell you.

[(Anonymous)]

or is it just that as a straighty, there weren't endless queues of hot men because, well, I was a lesbo?

There is also bisexuality! I am Reliably Informed by Reputable Sources that it is totally a thing.

[(Anonymous)]

Whaaaat?! Bisexuality? Never heard of it! Okay okay I am an asshole. The whole point, though, is HOT GIRL ALERT sexy affair no more falling into old patterns with the wrong person no no no.

[(Anonymous)]

Very Hot Girl news is awesome, but I wonder what the old patterns with the wrong person were?

(Not at all secretly wondering how I get more Hot Girls in my life, obviously.)

[(Anonymous)]

You mean, what were my old patterns, specifically? Oh...I think there was just so much isolation in our relationship and so much heavy bullshit that it was hard to see a way out of it, so every time I would think it would/should be over, I would get sucked back in because I believed I would never find anyone else who would put up with me (because unhappiness made me feel like I wasn't capable of loving anyone, really truly, so why not stick with this person who "loved enough for the both of us"). But really...I just wasn't happy, and forgot that I deserve to be.

Oh, and also, old relationship was a perfect outlet for my Christ complex. Alcoholic, meet Christ.

(I have NO IDEA. Apparently if you build it, they will come? Or, if you're not looking and you're finally happy and you start wearing tighter jeans and having better hair, they will come?)

[yiskah.livejournal.com]

ANONYMOUS PERSON I AM VERY JEALOUS! Both of the sex, and of the sense that you are getting sexier as you get older (WHICH I AM SURE YOU ARE) because it is so contrary to how I see myself.

[(Anonymous)]

I don't think I'm actually getting sexier as I get older, except that I kind of think that I am, which is the difference? Do you know what I mean? Like, my ontological sexiness is probably diminishing, really, but my perception of that sexiness is becoming more positive, which I think makes me better in the sack at the VERY least.

[(Anonymous)]

The last time we did this, someone had just ended it with me because he felt stressed out by his inability to get me off. Funnily enough, last night, the chap I'd been seeing for a fair few months broke up with me.

If I'm being honest it hadn't been good for a little while before that: he wanted it to be open, I didn't, he used phrases like "I feel trapped, but not by anything you're doing" and "I just want to push my sexual boundaries and I don't feel like you're as interested in that as I am, which is fine except that I still want to do that." Anyway, it was his first relationship ever. Not his first long-term relationship; his first relationship. So, okay, society valorizes a certain image of what it means to be in a relationship and I think that makes it easy to think you're on board with an idea of what being in a relationship means that you may find out in practice does not really correspond with what you want.

Only what he thought he wanted at first was in fact more or less similar to what I wanted, and I wish we hadn't had to hurt each other/spend time feeling guilty to work out there was a difference in the end. I also wish he hadn't intimated that exclusivity became less important to him because "subconsciously I guess I knew we weren't optimal for each other." WHAT. "I really don't want you to feel like this was anything you did wrong or that it was any deficiency on your part." Nice, I guess, but your little nod to Optimality Theory seems to undercut that a bit, doesn't it?

Oof. I'm a little more upset than I thought I'd be, given that I kind of knew this was coming. I guess I'm still in the "EVERYTHING IS RUBBISH" phase, which is just tiresome. A little variety would be nice, you know?

Anyway, tl;dr clearly the urge to run anonymous comment Fridays is deleterious to my relationships.

[yiskah.livejournal.com]

Oh dear, I am sorry that my anon comments are dooming your relationships! And I am sorry about the end of this one, though from what you've said it sounds like it may well be for the best.

[(Anonymous)]

I feel pretty sure that no-one will ever fancy/love me, but then I remember the people who have, and I feel bad for not appreciating that, and dreadful for thinking that they are not the sort of people I want to love and or fancy me, and so probably I deserve not to be loved or fancied by the people I would like to mutually love and or fancy. I think also though that I mostly submit to melancholia about sexual/romantic relationships when I am feeling lonely in platonic relationships. I think I would just like to be someone who I like's favourite person, or near favourite, and I don't think that's true for the people who are my favourite people.

I think I am basically worried about not being able to spend time with people I love when the end of the world comes and there is clinging.

[(Anonymous)]

I came here to say sort of the same thing I think. I'm realizing lately that I've been investing too much energy in people who wouldn't give me the attention and time I wanted or needed, and not nearly enough energy on the people I've liked and admired the most. I've not been daring enough, either in my pursuit of relationships or in thinking about who I want those relationships to be with and how I want them to play out.

It's not too late though! Hopefully the end of the world is a way off yet so there's still time to find people to be mutual favorites with.

[(Anonymous)]

Oh, anonymenters, I wonder if I'm cut out for long-term relationships. Every time, after a while, I get bored, and then I start resenting the person (who is usually just as lovely as they ever were) because I feel like they're a restriction. There are supposed to be all these compensations for sticking together, but they seem like trade-offs to me, and ones only worth making if you want to achieve some other thing like raising kids. If I don't want kids, why would I want to spend my life with only one person? Or am I terribly shallow for being appalled by the prospect of never sleeping with anyone else ever again? (It's not even so much about the sex as about getting to know someone in that completely absorbed, sharing-each-other way that seems to be taboo if you're not sleeping together.)